Joanne Wilson, neuropsychotherapist and relationship expert shares her two-part list to help get you thinking about ways you and those closest to you can enjoy time together this Christmas.
The Christmas/New Year holidays bring mixed emotions. As much as this can be a joyous and much anticipated time with family and friends, we cannot expect others to fulfil our happiness needs – or expect everything to run smoothly and harmoniously.
Plan some positive activities for yourself, to help make sure the coming weeks aren’t stressful, lonely or overwhelming.
Take a moment to consider your answers to the questions below. Both lists will help give you a head start on enjoying your relationships this Christmas and New Year.
Create a Meaningful 2024
Have fun creating a list of inspiring and meaningful things you look forward to doing in 2024.
- A fun activity I never have time for…
- An activity that always makes me laugh…
- An activity that relaxes me…
- An activity that connects me with people I care about…
- An activity that stimulates my brain to think…
- An activity that evokes wonderful memories…
- A spiritual activity that makes me feel connected…
- A fun activity I have never tried before…
Enjoy crossing off your ideas as you accomplish them throughout the year!
Be Proactive in Difficult Relationships
Let’s get real! There are often people you wouldn’t normally choose to spend time with, who you will be seeing over the Christmas and New Year season.
While no one is perfect, why not consider those who may fall into the below categories:
- Those who will judge or criticize…
- The inappropriate flirt…
- The most likely to ignite a vaccination debate…
- Those who make me feel small and belittled…
- The most likely to unashamedly control conversations…
- The most begrudged and unforgiving…
- Those who are self-centred and will show no interest in me…
How can I possibly look through the lens of love at these people?
Great question, here are your options:
- Visualise your confident approach to difficult interactions before you arrive or greet guests.
- Choose your “safe” people who you can respectfully enjoy sharing perspectives with.
- Adopt the fine art of changing the subject.
- Intentionally breathe through difficult topics as you smile, listen and refuse to “buy in”.
- Envision yourself circling above, remaining tolerant, empathetic, respectful and kind – even when others criticize.
- When necessary, excuse yourself and walk away to take time out to self-regulate.
Most of all, be responsible for your own happiness, and have a great Christmas and New Year!